I wrote down one thing I learned every day for 10 years. And I’m still writing…
Transformation Takes Time
For the remainder of your October, a few lessons on transition and transformation. Those leaves you’ve been admiring over the last few days, that have only suddenly evolved and caught your eye, those trees had it in them all year long. And you do too! Transformation takes time.
Imagine Yourself One Day From Now
Here’s something I learned on a trip a couple of years ago, when you are in the moment of panic, try to imagine how you might feel one day from now. Or if that’s too ambitious, maybe even a few hours from where you are. Picture yourself on the other side of the activity, the other side of the attack.
Never Stop Learning
You might not be taking a “First Day” photo again anytime soon, at least not sincerely, but that doesn’t mean the firsts have stopped and don’t let the learning stop either. You can just let things happen to you or you can make your days more productive and more useful by looking for the lesson.
Here are a handful of my favorite lessons from my very first journal and the beginning of my journaling practice. My first season of adult “firsts” if you will.
You can see Flurries and Petals at the same time
It’s that time of year… when you aren’t sure if the white specks blowing past you in the cold wind are snow flurries or petals from blossoms that bloomed too soon. An appreciation for this month or this season is really an appreciation for transition. In time, we’ll be certain they are petals and not snowflakes, but until then, they can be whichever one we need them to be right now.
Don’t Go Looking for Love, Go Looking for Things You Love To Do
Whether you are just married or don’t ever plan to be, or you are tired of swiping left and looking for a partner left and right, the “Love” chapter of Don’t Wear Shoes You Can’t Walk In highlights that at all stages, action—chasing, changing, losing, pursuing, and choosing—is necessary for love. So let your first action be that you are getting busy doing something you love to do.
Things aren’t the same because you aren’t the same
Every next stage of our lives requires us to grow and bring an advanced, different version of ourselves to the table. If things aren’t coming to use as easily as they used to, take a moment to look inward instead of just outward. It’s possible things aren’t the same, because you aren’t the same either.
Go To The Sunny Side
There’s a time of year where without even noticing it, we suddenly switch from seeking shade to seeking sun. Our respite now found in warmth instead of cool. Going to the sunny side is a choice we make. And it’s a choice we can make in our minds too.
It can take years to bear fruit.
We are a generation that expects immediate results, thanks to one-day shipping, rapid results, online results and the advancement and sophistication of many systems. But nature, our purest and truest resource, reminds us to be patient. Most plants and trees can take years to produce visible growth.
Get your reps in.
It’s okay if it feels unknown or unfamiliar at first, it’s because it’s new. Keep showing up, over and over again. You’ll learn the roads and feel confident and comfortable on them.
What’s one thing you wish you’d known before you left home?
At a recent book talk someone asked me this question. And it's such a good question to ask. Not just for “before you left home for college?” Or “before you left home to move to a new city?” What about what you wish you’d known “before you left home for your first day of work?” Or simply what you wish you’d known “before you left home today”…
Create a relationship that matters long before it matters
Relationships often create opportunity where there is none. I’ve been writing down one thing I learned every day for more than 10 years and at the heart of many memorable and sometimes life-altering lessons is a relationship or the absence of one.
The Host Can’t Leave the party
It’s about to be a long holiday weekend, which for many of you will include a party or a barbecue or two. Remember, the host can’t leave the party, so here’s a tip for preserving your independence if you are hosting this holiday weekend!
take the free samples
You might have to try a variety of different jobs or career paths in order to figure out the best one for you. While you are young, with fewer obligations or costs to worry about, explore as many opportunities as you can in order to figure out what you love to do. Don’t worry about wasting time or tasting too many different things.
write the book
“Write the Book.” It became more of a mantra than an item on a to-do list. It became something I’d write down for motivation, a reminder that this life is too short to not do the things you’ve always felt called to do and to contribute to this world.
Surround yourself with people who are willing to lift as they climb
You want to work, live, and surround yourself with people who are always working to improve themselves or others for the future, while still giving everything they have to the present. This kind of drive and care for others, it’s contagious.
Two Truths for Each Lie: How I (Finally) Quieted My Inner Critic
Many of the greatest aspects of my life might not exist if I had done any one thing differently. And so, to officially quiet this not-so-kind voice in my head that too often asks "what if?", I made a list. A new spin on two truths and a lie, I wrote down two truths for each of the biggest lies I tell myself.
You’re not here because you’re like everyone else…
In the early years of adulthood, it can be too easy to prioritize success and achievement and lose sight of who you are. You may quickly, and without even realizing it, find yourself working toward becoming someone you read about in a magazine or saw on LinkedIn.
Don’t Wear shoes You Can’t Walk In: About the title lesson
Of course, this lesson speaks to more than just literal shoes. It’s also about being true to yourself and not trying to be someone you are not. It’s a lesson that sums up so much of the decade that is your twenties.