What’s one thing you wish you’d known before you left home?
At a recent book talk someone asked me this question, “What’s one thing you wish you’d known before you left home?” This person was asking in regards to before they leave home for college, and while I’ve been writing advice for twentysomethings for a little while, I don’t think anyone had asked a question that dated back to before my twenties. This is such a good question to ask. Not just for “before you left home for college?” Or “before you left home to move to a new city?” What about what you wish you’d known “before you left home for your first day of work?” Or simply what you wish you’d known “before you left home today”…
In all of my learning and writing the most important thing I’ve uncovered is that something happens to you each day that you can take into the next day. You can either just let these things happen to you or you can take note of them and learn from them. Let them teach you, let them change you, let them make you, you.
Why did this moment happen in my life and what can I learn from it?
What’s one thing I wish I’d known before I left home today?
These are the types of questions I believe we should be asking ourselves every day. So here are a few of my answers.
What’s one thing I wish I’d known before I left home for college?
My off-the-cuff answer to this particular book talk iteration of the question “What’s one thing you wish you’d known before you left home?” included a lesson that I keep learning all the time. “There are more options to life than anyone in college can teach you.” I went to school for advertising and I loved my major and my work in the field afterward, but before I started living in the real world, I had a narrow view of the types of jobs that existed out there. There are so many things that I’ve done with my advertising degree and background, that I wish I’d known were possible sooner or that I’d given myself permission to feel accomplished with sooner. When my husband and I met, I was a marketing manager for a running and fitness non-profit and he specialized in payments consulting. These were both jobs and careers I didn’t know were options before or during college. There are already many more opportunities and career paths than there were, way back when in 2010, but I promise the same is still true for you. There are more options available to you than anyone can tell you or teach you about.
What’s one thing I wish I’d known before I started my first day of work?
“Things and people are often not as big as you assume.”
When starting any new job there is a healthy dose of humility you should bring with you. No one wants to meet a know-it-all on their first day. But also, don’t assume that the leadership team or the C-level teammates are unavailable to you. Don’t assume that anyone is a big deal or at their pinnacle. It’s more likely that everyone is at a small stop on their journey than it is that they’ve reached their peak or final work destination.
What’s one thing I wish I’d known before I left home today?
“Gratitude is a weapon against anxiety. Don’t forget to use it.”
I’ve become a bit more anxious over the last few years. Maybe it was the pandemic, maybe it was parenthood, most likely it was both. But I’m a more anxious person than I used to be and it’s something I’m working on. However, I’m aware enough to recognize that sometimes I let short sweeps of anxiety cloud an event or a day.
This happens in big ongoing ways, being anxious about upcoming travel and wanting to be able to control all of the elements of it. Is this trip too long? But is it long enough to make it worth it? Should we go? Will we make it on time or as planned? Is it safe? But this also happens in small ways. Like today, I was anxious about rain in the forecast when my family was headed out for a spontaneous and fun morning paddle board adventure. Should we go? Is it safe? Will we have enough time?
Today I got home from the paddle board trip where I had been worried about a heavy thunderstorm, and it didn’t rain a drop. I recognized that I had been a little too anxious to be grateful for this spontaneous weekday morning adventure, for the beauty of where we live and our ability to do something like this. In the same way, I’ve let doubt and questions about an upcoming trip keep me from jumping for joy that we’re all so blessed and fortunate to get to even travel to new cities, countries and places. To have support systems to help care for our families. So, to put it simply, sure it might pour rain, but it also might not rain at all, and the chances of you actually getting caught in a tornado are quite slim. Don’t let your anxiety get the best of you and your days, don’t be too anxious to be grateful.
When you get home tonight or settle down from the day, whether it was a big monumental day where you or someone you loved started school, or a new job or just a seemingly small and regular day, ask yourself… what’s one thing I wish I’d known before I left home today?